And we’re back…

A week and a half ago, engineering formally called bullshit on Lenin El Jefe’s optimistic schedule. The acting VP of Development came into my office, somber looking. I was expecting to be the sacrificial lamb for the slip, so I was listening only for the penance. Picture Charlie Brown:

wah wah wha wah wah window office.

Excuse Me? With El Jefe out of the picture, I’m next in seniority for a window office. Do I want it?

I was creeped out about sitting in the same space El Jefe formerly occupied, and was ready to turn it down. However, the proposal was a series of office conga-lining that rearranged people.

Sure. Hey, if I can get a corner office, I’ll be happy to delay the product as long as you’d like!

The move before me fell through, so I was asked if I’d like to take it.

“Hey, I’m going to be out of the office next week, can we do this when I return?”

I jokingly implored Princess to wave a headless chicken or do something mystical with herbs to ward off the “Evil Spirit.” While I was gone, the newsletter foretold the series of moves, starting with me going to “the vacant office next to [soandso].” (Note the delicious unperson-ness?)

Monday, I’m back in the office. I could put this off a few days, but it would best for everyone if I get my stuff moved over right away. The computer formerly used by the person formerly inhabiting the “vacant office next to [soandso]” has been reclaimed. Otherwise, the office was as it was two business weeks ago. There was about $6 worth of change in the desk organizer. He had a bunch of ThermoMeters taped to the wall. Creepy.

Since I didn’t want El Jefe’s cooties, my first act was to pull out any stuff that came in personal contact with him: keyboard (there were a lot of gross bits… ewwwww), mouse, and so on, tossing it in to the hallway. Next, I disinfected the furniture and moved my computer over. The HR person’s son, on winter break from school, here to just “help out,” cheerfully moved my heavy stuff. I was back to work in about 90 minutes.

As I’m trying to birth two products this week, it was a long day. Around 6:30pm, Marisela, the floor custodian, came in to empty the garbage and recycling bins. I always extend her courtesies, but we’ve never talked. She realizes I’m now in this office:

Captain Sarcastic: “Hello, Marisela.  I have a lot of stuff to toss out today and apologize this stuff is so heavy, may I help you with it?”

Marisela: “Where is [the former occupant]?”

Captain Sarcastic: “[El Jefe] no longer works here.”

Marisela: “Oh, good!”